绿色圃中小学教育网

 找回密码
 免费注册

QQ登录

只需一步,快速开始

查看: 5255|回复: 0
打印 上一主题 下一主题

初中英语作文Mymother评析

[复制链接]
跳转到指定楼层
楼主
发表于 2010-11-27 14:06:00 | 只看该作者 回帖奖励 |倒序浏览 |阅读模式
My mother

My mother has long hair. She has two small eyes. a small nose and a not big mouth. She is in a beautiful dress. I have to say : "She is a beautiful women ! " If yousay to me : "Who is she? " I must answer : "She is my mother! " My mother is aChinese women. She is 39, but she looks young. My mother is cute and smart. She can sing many good sangs. And she cooks very nice. When she free, she must sweep the floor, wash clothes, and cook a good dinner . I love my mother very much!

She has long hair. She has two small eyes. a small nose and a not big(not一般和be动词或助动词连用,这里建议用small) mouth. She is in(in也表穿衣的状态,但后面接颜色等词表穿什么颜色的衣服,改为wearing更恰当) a beautiful dress.

I have to say : "She is a beautiful women(改为woman) ! " If yousay to(改为ask) me : "Who is she? " I must answer : "She is my mother! "
My mother is aChinese women(改为woman). . She is 39, but she looks young. My mother is cute and smart. She can sing many good sangs(songs). And she cooks very nice(cook是动词,应该用副词来修饰,建议用well). When she free(改为is free,形容词放于be之后作表语), she must sweep the floor, wash clothes, and cook a good dinner .
I love my mother very much!

文笔流畅,字里行间流露出浓浓亲情和小作者对妈妈无限的爱,文章也比较完整,希望不断努力,取得更大的进步!
分享到:  QQ好友和群QQ好友和群 QQ空间QQ空间 腾讯微博腾讯微博 腾讯朋友腾讯朋友
收藏收藏 分享分享 顶 踩
回复

使用道具 举报

您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 免费注册

本版积分规则

绿色圃中小学教育网 最新主题

GMT+8, 2024-11-24 21:17

绿色免费PPT课件试卷教案作文资源 中小学教育网 X3.2

© 2013-2016 小学语文数学教学网

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表